How to manage your kids' time online
If you’ve decided it’s time for a detox, there are plenty of ways to make it more palatable to your children.
The first step is to open a dialogue with your children about their use and your concerns. It’s human nature to respond better to change if you have a sense of control over what’s happening, so discussing why you are worried and brainstorming what you can do together is less likely to meet resistance.
Set a challenge to make it more fun
Challenges are a popular method of behaviour change and are a great way to make logging off a little more fun. You may want to set a five-day total wifi ban, a hand held device ban, or a “wi-fi free weekend” challenge, for example.
Andrew Kinch, founder of Game Aware, a program helping teens successfully tackle problem gaming use, has several challenges he sets with his gamers to help cut back their time – and show them how much more value they can get from their time online if they play smarter, rather than longer; or as describes it “turn their habit back into a hobby.”
A recent challenge he’s added to his program is the Greyscale Challenge. “This is where all their game screens are set to Greyscale – you can also do this on hand held devices if social media, game apps or email are more your focus.
With the gamers in my program, I don’t put any restriction on how much time they can play their games for, on the condition all of it is done in Greyscale only. Because they still have autonomy, I don’t get any resistance to following the challenge, but we find people rapidly curb their tech time because it isn’t as appealing – it’s pretty boring in fact!”
You’ll need to be more available
One thing to be aware of when undertaking a digital detox is there’s a high chance you’ll need to be more available yourself. Simply removing technology but not recognising that it fulfils a purpose with providing entertainment and even a social life for older children that engage in multi-player games mean the whining will kick in quickly.
You may decide it’s a great week to get to know your local area as a family better – perhaps try a new café or ice cream stop each day. It could also be a great time to set up a board game challenge, teach them to play cards or chess, or get a walking for fitness regime set up. Or you may plan with other parents and organise some extra play dates.
Do allow a little boredom to creep in though – it’s often when
children come up with the most creative ideas (our one-week detox netted us an unplanned new veggie patch, for example - until the dogs dug it up the next day!)
Reset the boundaries for the whole family
Digital detoxes are a great opportunity to reset how the whole family uses technology and create better habits. Some tips for allowing the benefits to extend beyond the detox period?
- Create a family docking station – all devices being put in a central spot outside of allowed times of usage (this means you too, parents!) – link to parent story
- Create set times for use – you can spend some of your new free time discussing the hours of use you are comfortable with and negotiating as a family to make them suit everyone’s needs and lifestyle
- Log in to your internet provider settings and create time slots of use for various devices to make sure everyone is sticking to their agreements
Technology has provided a wide range of benefits to the whole family – academically and socially, but it needs to be handled carefully so ensure the risks don’t outweigh these benefits.
A digital detox, big or small, can help reset the family technology use and create better habits for the future