Essential tips to avoid break-up weight gain

Breaking up is hard to do. It can leave you feeling confused and rejected.

Some people lose weight following a break-up because their appetite decreases. However, many more people overeat and add a few extra kilos to their heartache.

At times of emotional upset, it’s more important than ever to safeguard your health, your wellbeing and your outlook.

Here’s how to navigate the end of a relationship without piling on the weight. This article is brought to you courtesy of Dr Cindy Nour.

How feeling miserable leads to comfort eating

So, your relationship is breaking up and you feel devastated that your partner no longer wants to be with you. You lie in bed wishing you did not have to work, but you summons enough energy to get dressed without brushing your hair.

On the way to work you stop and grab a coffee. Danish or banana bread? You feel like crap anyway, so you grab both. 

You sit at your desk feeling bored and look through emails while quickly scoffing the pastry and banana bread. Just to make things worse, you log onto Facebook and notice your partner’s status has changed to single.

At this point you go to the kitchen and raid the biscuit box and make yourself a comforting hot chocolate.

Permission-giving thoughts

A word of warning: now that you are single – ice cream and chocolate might seem like great company to cuddle up with on the sofa, but this duo will not lead you to meeting the new love interest of your dreams!

While you cannot control whether your partner wants to be you, you can manage your thinking and how you deal with the break-up.

What are the thoughts that sabotage your healthy eating and prevent you from being your fabulous single self?

Psychologists call these permission-giving thoughts. They allow you to rationalise the not-so-good stuff that you eat. Here are a few examples:

• “I know this isn’t that healthy, but it’s OK because I have been feeling like crap since the break-up.”
• “I feel so lonely, so I’ll just have this yummy treat now because it will make me feel better.”
• “I really shouldn’t have this, but now that I am cooking for one, what's the point of going to much effort to make something healthy?”
• “I’m feeling happy now I have my freedom back. I will worry about dieting later.”
• “It’s all too hard. I’ve already stuffed up this morning, there’s no point to sticking to the diet today.”

Why these thoughts suck

These thoughts are not your friend! They are disguised as your friend, but they are your foe.

Why are they not your friend? Because …

• They undermine your confidence to lose weight
• They allow you to disregard the sensible advice given by others
• They encourage you to believe that you don’t have any control over your eating behaviour and your weight
• They lead you to lose motivation and give up on your weight loss goals

Take positive action

There are plenty of positive actions you can take to deal with toxic thoughts.

Change your situation- Go out more often so that you are not home alone, longing for your ex. You could start a hobby or a new type of exercise to meet new people. This is a good time to connect with friends old and new, online and in person.

Change your routine- Don’t do everything that you used to do together, or visit your old haunts. Try new experiences.

Do not drink and text!

Manage your thoughts

Here are some examples of healthy and helpful ways to think about food to help you stay sane.

• "I don’t need to eat this right now. I will be eating dinner in 2 hours. I’m going to step away from the fridge and go back to my desk. If I still feel hungry in 20 minutes, I’ll eat an apple.”
• "This café reminds me of my old relationship. I feel so sad right now, but I can get through this. I will not complicate the situation by overeating. It only makes me feel worse about my weight and appearance.”
• "I don’t need to go to the vending machine. I am really just trying to avoid that awkward phone call about getting my key back. Once I’ve done it, I’ll call my best friend to off-load about how the call went.”

Responding to your sabotaging thoughts like this takes time and practice. It also takes time to get over a break-up.

However, now you can focus on yourself wholeheartedly and get into shape.

Even though it can be difficult, it’s a great opportunity to move forward with life. Work on the things you can change and go for it!